Autographs

This is, in a way, a remembrance and reminiscing post. (It's gonna be a long one so if you're tome-o-phobic, look away now.)

Your life is, in effect, an empty autograph book. You lead your life, and different people walk in and out of it, leaving their mark behind, forever and ever. No matter how small that signature is, or how eloquent, or even if tears the page it's written on. The marks remain, and they truly influence our lives.

A few years ago, when i was sitting my GCSE's, i had to walk to school, every day. In a small town, it was easy to recognise faces, especially in a half hour route to the same place at the same time, every morning. One particular guy, i never knew his name, but no matter what, he stopped to say hello. It wasn't a big thing, it was just the fact that someone had the confidence to do so. That man became a good luck charm for me, as well as a sort of inspiration. I don't know his name and we've never said another word to each other but... its something that sticks in my mind.

It is really the little things that make a difference, truly. A few of my friends and family have passed things on to me, and they may be gone but their influence on me remains. The strongest example i can think of is my love for A Perfect Circle, a band whose name was introduced to me by Lee Lassegard... sadly shes no longer around, and we never did meet, but music is a big part of my life and for her to have changed it in such a way is something very special indeed.

Thank you, Lee.

And then of course, there are the people who hurt you so deeply it leaves you scarred. To those people in MY life, i'd like to say thank you also, because you've made me who i am today, and i'd never be anything less without your help. I hope that the next person you hurt is strong enough to realise that your ilk are only fleeting scratches - and to those who have been hurt as much and more, these are the times that show you who your real friends are, the ones who's autographs you should have tattooed. I can only truly say there are two people i've ever met that i could hate, but there are far more who have disappointed me. As much as i'd like to forget i can't - and i have learnt to grow with my marred emotions. Its a shame that the book has closed on you, because i'm almost certain you would have been interesting, underneath it all. As much as i'd like to take away the page you signed, a part of me would be missing, would it not?

I am who i am, because of everyone.